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Breakfast with Ron & Robert

Don’t forget! This Saturday, June 11 is Breakfast with Ron & Robert: Second Saturday Divorce Workshop. This month’s speakers include Attorney Robert Borsky, James E. Walton, Ph.D., and Pete Collins, CFP. You’ll learn about the legal divorce, the emotional divorce, and the financial divorce. You’ll be able to ask questions and get answers. Register before 4 p.m. this Friday, June 10 and get 50% off the registration fee. Register online by clicking HERE or call us toll free at (888) 852-9961.

Honest, Blunt & Brilliant: The Problem with Court

This is the fourth and final installment of Honest, Blunt, & Brilliant: Interviews with Attorney Leslie Ellen Shear. This week she talks about some of the problems with California’s family law courts.

“Family courts have been the stepchild of the judicial system all over the world for all of history. They don’t receive the percentage of trial court funding proportionate to the number cases, complexity of cases, importance of cases to individuals involved or the importance of the wellbeing of families and children to the society as a whole. The caseload and the budgets do not compute.”


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Missed Parts 1, 2 & 3? Here they are:

Honest, Blunt & Brilliant: “A” Stood for Alternative
Honest, Blunt & Brilliant: Child Development
Honest, Blunt & Brilliant: Custody Matters

Don’t miss another episode! Subscribe to Ron and Robert on Divorce on iTunes.

Learn more about Leslie Ellen Shear at CustodyMatters.com.

May Newsletter: Retiring?

Who Wants to Retire?

What we have learned over time about retirement is that people in their twenties don’t plan because they think they’ll never die. People in their thirties don’t plan because they are too busy building careers and keeping up with the Joneses. People don’t plan during their forties because they’re too busy paying off their kids’ college tuition. Most don’t start planning until their fifties, sixties, and seventies and sometimes that’s too late. It’s not too late for you. When are you going to plan? Is your plan current? Know that laws change every year and plans need to be reviewed and updated to reflect these changes.

We are pleased to announce that we’ve joined Wealth Counsel, the premier Estate Planning organization for Estate Planning Attorneys. We offer Estate Planning services to clients who are considering reviewing, renewing, or initiating their estate plan. We can draft your simple or complex will, a living trust, or a more complex and elaborate wealth transfer plan. Call us today. We are here to serve you.

On another note…

Let’s Bring Back That Loving Feeling

Dr. Mark Goulston wrote an article titled, Human Cooling, Global Warming, & Childhood Obesity, that reflects his observations of our society today. How we’ve replaced listening with lecturing, taking responsibility with excuse-making, contentment with immediate gratification, value with ROI, giving with taking. This is not true for all people, but, unfortunately, it is true for many. Why? Why have we replaced joyful laughter with laughing at others, and gratitude for our blessings with disappointment for what we lack? According to Dr. Goulston, we’ve done it because we’ve lost sight of life’s positives. We grasp at ‘stuff,’ to fill the gaping hole left behind.

The more we make excuses, blame others, react without listening, and indulge in resentments, the more likely we will consume, buy, take, and grab to fill the void. The more we listen, contemplate, give to others, and take responsibility for our actions and choices, the more complete and whole we begin to feel. Dr. Goulston recommends the following powerful exercise to anyone who wants to bring back more of those loving feelings.

1. Think of someone you are grateful to, why you are grateful to them, and the difference they have made in your life. Contact them (or a surviving family member if they have passed) and tell them. Thank them.

2. Think of someone to whom you need to apologize. Contact them and apologize. If it’s been a long time say, “This is a long overdue apology, but time slipped away and I felt too embarrassed to contact you. I’m contacting you now to tell you I ____________________. I was wrong and I am sorry.” If you use email, write in the subject line, “A long overdue apology,” which should get their attention.

This exercise will uplift you and give you a new attitude towards life. It will be easier to take care of your health and you will be able to model these positive, powerful behaviors for your children. To read Dr. Goulston’s article, click here.

Best wishes,
Ron Supancic, CFLS and Robert Borsky, Esq.
Partners at The Law Collaborative, LLP

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What Every Client Should Know

By Robert Borsky, Esquire

Did you know that if you use an Apple iPhone, iPad3G, or a Google Android system phone, these devices are gathering information on you? Recently two data collection researchers, Alastair Allan and Pete Warden, have discovered that Apple has been Collecting data on their purchasers’ of iPhone and iPad3G.  According to the research, the operating system “iOS 4” has an hidden file.  The file is known as the “consolidated.db” file, and it stores your geolocation, the date and time at regular intervals.  The data is collected by the device, and then sent back to Apple. They know a lot about you from the history, and they know where the device is located – not necessarily where you are unless you are carrying the device.

You allowed Apple to track and you consented to the iPhone EULA, [End User Legal Agreement] which stated:

When you interact with Apple, we may collect personal information relevant to the situation, such as your name, mailing address, phone number, email address, and contact preferences; your credit card information and information about the Apple products you own, such as their serial numbers and date of purchase; and information relating to a support or service issue.

According to the researchers, Alastair Allan and Pete Warden, you may prevent Apple from collecting data from your iPhone or iPad3G, by selecting the Encrypted iPhone Backup when you connect to iTunes.

The Wall Street Journal interviewed a security analyst, Samy Kamkar and discovered that Apple is not the only one collecting data, Google is doing the same with the Android systems.

Click here to read more…

Fortunately, Apple recently announced that they will fix the tracking bug.

Honest, Blunt & Brilliant: Custody Matters

Ron and Robert had the opportunity to interview Attorney Leslie Ellen Shear at the Pepperdine Law School Consensual Dispute Resolution seminar in 2010. Leslie Ellen Shear is a graduate of UCLA Law School, a California State Bar Board Certified Family Law Specialist and Certified Appellate Law Specialist, and she’s the author of numerous published opinions. Ron and Robert have known her for over twenty-five years and she is one of their most respected colleagues. Honest, blunt, and brilliant, Leslie Ellen Shear is a true powerhouse.

This week Attorney Shear finishes her conversation on child development, then goes on to discuss move-away cases, frequency of contact between children and parents, and the current problems in the California Family Law courts.

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Missed Parts 1 & 2? Here they are:

Honest, Blunt & Brilliant: “A” Stood for Alternative
Honest, Blunt & Brilliant: Child Development

Don’t miss another episode! Subscribe to Ron and Robert on Divorce on iTunes and tune in next week for the final episode in this four-part series, Honest, Blunt & Brilliant: The Problem with Court.

Learn more about Leslie Ellen Shear at CustodyMatters.com.

Honest, Blunt & Brilliant: Child Development

Ron Supancic asked Attorney Leslie Ellen Shear what steps parents can take to insure that their children are not harmed by the divorce and she answered,”They can take a deep breath to begin with.”

In part two of this four-part series, Attorney Shear describes beautifully the emotional process a couple goes through while divorcing, what their children go through, and what parents can do to help their children get through it.

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Missed Part 1? Here it is:

Honest, Blunt & Brilliant: “A” Stood for Alternative

Don’t miss another episode! Subscribe to Ron and Robert on Divorce on iTunes and tune in next week for Honest, Blunt & Brilliant: Custody Matters.

Learn more about Leslie Ellen Shear at CustodyMatters.com.

Honest, Blunt & Brilliant: “A” Stood for Alternative

Ron and Robert caught up with Attorney Leslie Ellen Shear at the Pepperdine Law School Consensual Dispute Resolution seminar in 2010. Leslie Ellen Shear is a graduate of UCLA Law School, a Board Certified Family Law Specialist, a Certified Appellate Law Specialist, and the author of numerous published opinions. Ron and Robert have known her for over twenty-five years and she is a deeply respected colleague. Honest, blunt, and brilliant, Leslie Ellen Shear is a true powerhouse.

In the first of this four-part series, Attorney Shear discusses the shift from Alternative Dispute Resolution (ADR) to Consensual Dispute Resolution (CDR), as well as the pros and cons of both CDR and the traditional adjudicative legal system.

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Subscribe to Ron and Robert on Divorce on iTunes and tune in next week for Honest, Blunt, and Brilliant: Child Development.

Learn more about Leslie Ellen Shear at CustodyMatters.com.

Mary Culbert’s ABCs of Mediation (Part 3 of 3)

Thanks to the new USA television show, Fairly Legal, mediation is getting a lot more attention than ever before. But how does it really work? In Part 3 of Mary Culbert’s ABCs of Mediation, Southern California’s own real life mediation guru takes listeners through a step-by-step guide to the mediation process.

Missed Parts 1 and 2?  Listen now:

Part 1: Mediation giant Mary Culbert discusses how her family history and a background in theatre paved the way to a career as a peacemaker.

Part 2: Every question you’ve ever had about mediation answered in a single podcast.

Don’t miss another episode! Subscribe to Ron and Robert on Divorce on iTunes.

Mary Culbert’s ABCs of Mediation (Part 2 of 3)

What’s the difference between community mediation programs and private mediators?  Are there different styles of mediation? What kinds of mediation are available?  When can mediation come in handy?  What kind of ethical duty do mediators have to make sure everyone gets a fair shake? How do you complete your case after you’ve made a mediated agreement? Are there ever situations when mediation is not a good idea?

Mary Culbert, Bilingual Certified Mediator, Associate Clinical Professor at Loyola Law School, and president of The Loyola Law School Center for Conflict Resolution answers every question you’ve ever had about mediation but were afraid to ask. (Special thanks to Ron and Robert on Divorce for asking the tough questions.)

Missed last week’s episode? Listen now:

Part 1: Mediation giant Mary Culbert discusses how her family history and a background in theatre paved the way to her career as a peacemaker.

Don’t miss another episode! Subscribe to Ron and Robert on Divorce on iTunes.

News from The Law Collaborative

News from The Law Collaborative

Ron and Robert are pleased to announce that they will be presenting a workshop at the 2011 Orange County Mediation Conference along with Kathryn Dager, President of Profitivity Inc. Be sure to check out our Events page for more information.

Also, this Saturday is Breakfast with Ron and Robert: The Second Saturday Divorce Workshop. This month Irene Smith, CDFA will discuss important financial issues, and Dr. James Walton will discuss the emotional issues that arise during divorce.  You may not need this workshop, but someone you know does. Register by Friday, March 11 and get a 50% discount on the registration fee. Register online at TheLawCollaborative.com/SecondSaturday.htm or call our offices at (888)852-9961.

The Marriage Eulogy

By Ty Supancic, Esquire

There is an old saying, “History is written by the winners.” In litigation, there are winners and losers. We believe that when parties in crisis choose mediation over litigation, everyone has the potential to come out a winner. If the winners write history, why can’t the winners in a dissolution write their own history?

Fifty years after a divorce, the children and grandchildren of the original divorcing couple will tell and believe a story about why their parents and grandparents divorced, what kind of people they were, and what aftermath or legacy they left behind. A couple going through a dissolution has the opportunity to write what they would like that story to be. By writing that story, and by keeping that story in mind, they can guide their actions and decisions in such a way that the story can become a sort of self-fulfilling prophecy. Without having the story as a guideline, the parties are building without a plan, traveling without a map. They’ll build something and end up somewhere, but not with anything or anywhere they would have hoped.

The exercise of having individuals who are going through a dissolution of marriage write a “Joint Divorce Story” is not a new idea. Ron has been recommending it to his clients for years. Unfortunately, few ever take the time to engage in this useful exercise. Oftentimes they confuse the Joint Divorce Story with a mission statement or their short-term goals. The exercise might be more easily understood if it is renamed “The Marriage Eulogy”.

One of our paralegals, Maria, told me that when she was in high school, the nuns had them write their own eulogy as part of a “Death and Dying” class exercise. The idea was that by writing about all the great things they wanted to be remembered for when they died, one might be guided in making decisions during their lives. The Marriage Eulogy has the same goal.

Click here to read the rest of the article…

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Very truly yours,
Ron Supancic, CFLS and Robert Borsky, Esq.
Partners at The Law Collaborative, LLP